Musings on Jealousy & Poop

It dawned on me again for the umpteenth time in the last who knows how long that I spend an awful lot of time comparing myself to others. In particular to others accomplishments, skills, experiences, etc. I've throughout my life thought that this was a good thing because it made me want to be better, try harder, do more. What I'm realizing as I get older is that what it accomplishes now is self-sabotage.

This thought occurred twice today for two reasons. The first was as I was reading through my friends blog and thinking, "Wow, she really is a wonderful writer. So engaging and personal without being TOO personal. I want to write like that!" The second was while reading Architectural Record (December 2008). The archrecord2 article focuses on Ammar Eloueini and his research based work. While reading the article I was thinking about another entry I'm working on about material research and thinking, "I want to do that! How can I start designing installations?" After a series of reminders about how "it takes years Caroline" and "calm down, you're just getting started," and "for f's sake Caroline - learn how to focus on something for longer than two minutes and you may actually accomplish something," I managed to flip through another seven pages and stopped again. William Morgan reviewed the book Seventy-nine Short Essays on Design by Michael Bierut, and he includes a quote, a quote so adequate for this ridiculous wining I've been subjecting my brain cells through that it actually made me stop - and write this entry. The quote you ask?

...the more things you are interested in, the better your work will be

Is it true? I think that yes, to a point it is, but there's something to be said about being able to zoom in on something and really follow it through. To have the patience to explore one thing, one thought, one - something. To be able to commit to truly understanding rather than throwing it out like the wrapping paper you use once and even though you know you've not developed it to its fullest potential there's that shiny new wallpaper over there waiting to be tried.

I enjoy knowing a little bit about alot of things, more so than I think I would knowing alot about a few things, but it seems that this way of thinking, of doing, of being, will place limitations on where I can go in my career and so perhaps what I need to do is figure out where I WANT to go and learn how to walk a gray line between committing and flitting.

Patience is finally occurring in my life, perhaps focus will too.

So perhaps the point of all this is that I'm going to try to quit comparing myself to others and focus on MY strengths - like the fact that I can hold a two minute conversation with anyone, that I can spend years making a decision and somehow get people to think it's spontaneous when I finally do something about it, that I can read AND follow 3, 4, 5 books at one time and that I'm an idea person. An idea person. THAT is what I like about me.

Now on to my favorite story about the built environment from the news this week:

PIGEON POOP BLAMED FOR AWNING COLLAPSE

Seriously, you've got to love the AP for some of the newsworthy items they cover, and believe it or not, it is newsworthy!

Think about this, it's a design issue. Was it a canopy such as this or an awning such as this? My hunch is the former (this post may lead to a future post on how irritating it is when people don't follow the definition of a word - I know I'll probably get called on this sometimes and PLEASE feel free to do it) is what they meant and while the article from the Associated Press tenders the idea that the collapse is due to 4-5 inches of pigeon poo collecting I've got to wonder if maybe its due more to the corrosive effects of bird waste than it is to the weight of it.

Either way, there are seem to be two design issues here (the world is occurring in two's today)

1. The "awning" was designed in such a way as to allow for birds to have their happy hour rather than taking in to account that a perch is a perch and if you're gonna provide it they're gonna use it so let's try to find a way to either NOT provide the perch or...


2. The "awning" was not designed in a way which allowed ease of maintenance (ooh, this gets me thinking about my current project at the office, I may have to think about that over my vacation)

I could continue to elaborate on this but it's late, I'm tired and even though the office is closed tomorrow (today) I don't get to stay away because well, it's difficult to say you can't get there because of the snow when you live across the street